A true politician, you have played all sides - an authoritarian libertarian, and a socialist capitalist.

Absolute power may corrupt absolutely, but it’s easier than leading a coalition government twice.

If it moves, tax it!

You will know my name by my trail of astronomically high crime figures

You have become a true hero of the environmental movement, expect a statue made of recycled plastic.

It’s astonishing how many times an assassin's bullet has failed to achieve its objective.

People use terms like 'technocracy' to describe your efforts to build a super educated population.

Our citizens do enjoy a bit of the good stuff these days, be it alcohol, tobacco, or just donuts.

We now have more guns in the country than we do dogs, cats, people and birds combined.

The rich may not be cuddly, but we still enjoy giving them a darned good squeeze now and then.

Transport is bigger and better! Space program is bigger and better! Prisons are bigger and better!

Short hours, high wages and agreeable working practices make this a paradise for people in work!

What do we want? CARS! When do we want them? CARS!

Praise the lord! For our country has truly achieved heights of impressive piety.

Your reluctance to stick to manifesto pledges is something of vote winner. Congratulations, I guess.

Who are we to tell you what to do? Oh, that's right we're a brutal, authoritarian regime.

Son, if you want to make money these days I have just one word for you: Gravedigging.

You truly believe that future generations should have things better off than those that came before.

Our country is at the nexus of international agreement and has a reputation second to none.

Just keep saying to yourself “Winners don’t quit” and add them to the autobiography hit list.

They said a socialist paradise could not be built, but we have built it here together!