Clear all balls off the pool table

Take both paths to the house

Complete The Stanley Parable in under 4 minutes 22 seconds (not including load times)

No seriously, we disabled it.

Click on door 430 five times.

Don't play The Stanley Parable for ten years.

Set all settings sliders in the menu to all the available numbers.

Spend time with the people you love.

Reach the seventh mile

Reach the fifth mile

Reach the third mile

Reach the first mile