While inside Mr. Slave, you summoned Mr. Slave.

You defeated Princess Kenny and recovered the Stick of Truth.

You defeated Princess Kenny while living with Dire AIDS.

You've spent $500.

You've unlocked all of the upgrades for a New Kid ability.

You've let Kenny die in combat 10 times over the course of the game.

You collected 15 Chinpokomon.

You befriended the Goths, like everyone else playing this game.

You flung a turd of your own creation at an enemy.

You successfully blocked every enemy attack in a single (non-tutorial) battle.

You farted on 10 enemies in the world that were knocked out.

Over the course of the game, you've blocked 100 attacks.