You opened all of the garages in South Park.

You knocked out 3 or more enemies with a single fart outside of battle.

You befriended the Goths, like everyone else playing this game.

You sold 300 junk items.

You've unlocked all of the upgrades for a New Kid ability.

You have joined the KKK.

You farted on 10 enemies in the world that were knocked out.

Gingers have bitten you 3 times without you blocking.

You've farted on people 100 times.

You defeated the Meth Tweekers while wearing the Evil Cartman goatee and bald cap.

Over the course of the game, you've blocked 100 attacks.

You defeated 3 enemies in one battle while your buddy was knocked out.

You accepted your fate and chose the name Douchebag yourself.