You interrupted 5 channel attacks by using a fart.

You defeated the Grand Wizard Cartman in battle.

You farted on 10 enemies in the world that were knocked out.

You befriended the Goths, like everyone else playing this game.

You opened all of the garages in South Park.

You've unlocked all of the upgrades for a New Kid ability.

You've farted on people 100 times.

You have joined the KKK.

You shat your pants during a boss battle.

Over the course of the game, you've scored 100 perfect attacks.

You successfully blocked every enemy attack in a single (non-tutorial) battle.

You defeated the Meth Tweekers while wearing the Evil Cartman goatee and bald cap.

You accepted your fate and chose the name Douchebag yourself.