You have joined the KKK.

Gingers have bitten you 3 times without you blocking.

You've farted on people 100 times.

Over the course of the game, you've blocked 100 attacks.

You successfully blocked every enemy attack in a single (non-tutorial) battle.

You farted on 10 enemies in the world that were knocked out.

You accepted your fate and chose the name Douchebag yourself.

Defeated Mariska.

Kill 500 zombies.

Leapfrogged 10 times in a row.

Pick up 1,000 zombie medals.

Destroyed 300 objects in the game.