You collected 5 Chinpokomon.

You farted on 10 enemies in the world that were knocked out.

You successfully blocked every enemy attack in a single (non-tutorial) battle.

You accepted your fate and chose the name Douchebag yourself.

Complete "Payback" Co-op map (Online/Offline).

Complete "Lights Out" Co-op map (Online/Offline).

Complete "Sidetracked" Co-op map (Online/Offline).

Win $1500 playing poker.

Kill Hoyt.

Complete Riley's interrogation.

Gather all the memory cards.

Gather all "Letters of the Lost".

Use your wingsuit to reach the Southern island.